Awesome Cracked

Did you know that an idiot intentionally caused a train collision as a spectacle? And that lady in the sketch? That’s Pocahontas. Or not. After all, our idea of Shakespeare’s looks is based on the work of a mediocre artist who never even met the man. All that and more in Cracked’s video.

Cracked combined the U.S. Republican and Democratic presidential debates and imagined what would happen if the candidates actually spoke their minds. The result would be just as pointless but more entertaining. #killallthefish

(PG-13: Language) “I am telling you that it’s not as awesome as I keep accidentally making it sound!” Cracked breaks down the main story of Assassin’s Creed and why it’s gone down the drain: because this theoretically cool series should’ve ended long ago. Skip to 1:34.

Cracked points out some of the useless quirks of some superhero movies: totally unnecessary revisions, overusing characters and settings, and repeating origin stories. Do the opposite and you might just get a winner.

“As if we wouldn’t immediately and wordlessly take your money any other day of the year.” Cracked’s cold blooded explanation might just save a brainwashed shopper or two. John Oliver, Adam Conover and Roger should co-host the apocalypse.

Woody and his fellow toys appear to be immortal, so they’ll inevitably lose the humans they love. On the other hand, they traumatized Sid, who’s merely as crazy as any real kid. That and more in Cracked’s surprisingly convincing dismantling of Toy Story‘s charm.

A handful of YouTubers make a lot of money by making prank videos. But Cracked reminds us that many of these so-called practical jokes are actually forms of violence, bullying, harrassment or sometimes just lying, but with a disclaimer and a camera.

(PG-13: Language) “Can you really put a price on love? Yes. Love costs on average $31,500.” Cracked and Roger are back to remind us not to splurge on weddings. Remember lovebirds, you also need money after you get married. You know, to live.

Cracked takes another cynical look at corporations, this time taking on auto insurance, which is not only legally mandated, but the companies what they can to avoid paying claims, and then penalize you for doing exactly what you paid them for.

Cracked rips apart car dealerships: government mandated businesses operating at thin margins who make their money on service, finance charges, and add-ons. Seriously, why can’t we just order cars from direct from manufacturers?

After mocking fast food commercials, Cracked is back to tell us what they really think of so-called sports drinks, which are generally packed with stuff that’s really not very good for us. But it’s not like they call them “health drinks,” right?