“Well, I wouldn’t say it’s good, but I would say it’s effective.” Cracked and Roger are back to ruin yet another thing that makes us happy. Breakfast cereals are addicting carb flakes made from American tradition, sugar and market research.
“In reality, you’re 5,000 times more likely to get hit by lightning.” Cracked’s scumbag businessman reminds us that you’re better off doing anything else with your cash than playing the lottery. It’s fun to dream, but lotteries prey on needy folks by offering false hopes.
(Gross) “I should note there’s no oversight as to what constitutes ‘high quality.’ I’m just allowed to call things that.” Roger a.k.a. Honest Satan talks about how the meat industry caters to the modern flesh ingester.
(PG-13: Language) It’s not that we expected flawless logic from Pinocchio, but as Cracked explains this Disney classic doesn’t make sense even on its own terms, from Geppetto’s carelessness with his prized child to Jiminy Cricket talking about snitching in a kids’ movie.
“If you sign up now, we’ll even waive the initiation fee that we created just so we could waive it.” Gyms aren’t total scams – some people don’t have room (or a safe neighborhood) to exercise at home. Just be smart about what you pay for and show up.
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